It’s OK Not to Win Social Story

The It’s Okay Not to Win social story utilizes a reassuring tone and visuals to help children handle losing graciously. For some students, losing games and contests can be upsetting and hard to process emotionally. This research-backed narrative provides expectations and perspective around losing to reduce anxiety. The story explains that games and competitions have winners and losers, and losing is no reason to get upset. It acknowledges that losing does not feel good, but encourages positive coping strategies like congratulating the winner, trying again, and remembering you can’t win every time.

Social stories outline situational responses in a concrete way children relate to. This story models calm acceptance of defeat and separates self-worth from success. Teachers, counselors, and parents can use this narrative to shape constructive perspectives on loss. It fosters emotional regulation, sportsmanship, and resilience. Children learn to see losing as an opportunity for growth, not as a source of shame. For students who fixate on achievement and winning, this story delivers essential social-emotional lessons - our value lies within, and failure is necessary for learning. By teaching expected responses and self-talk through modeling, social stories provide a research-backed way to instill healthy outlooks. This uplifting narrative sets children up for success by giving them tools to process defeat.

These books should be used over and over to reinforce the point so I would suggest either putting the pages into a display book or laminating and binding them.

Clipart images courtesy of Kari Bolt.